5 Common Mistakes Parents Make in California Custody & Support Cases
Child custody and support proceedings in California are emotionally charged, deeply personal, and legally complex. The stakes are high: parents are not only advocating for their rights but also for the future and well-being of their children.
In the midst of legal documents and court dates, it’s easy to make seemingly small mistakes that can lead to lasting consequences. Understanding and avoiding common missteps can be the difference between a manageable legal process and one riddled with delays, disputes, or costly setbacks.
This guide highlights five critical mistakes that parents often make during child custody and support disputes, and how to avoid them.
1. Ignoring Court Orders in California Custody & Support Cases
Once a court order is in place, both parents are legally obligated to follow it — to the letter. Under California law, both parties are expected to follow the order fully, regardless of whether the other parent is cooperative.
Failing to comply can lead to serious consequences, including contempt of court (which may result in fines or jail time), and license or wage-related enforcement measures through the California Department of Child Support Services (DCSS).
Even if you feel the order is unfair or outdated, the right path is always to seek a formal modification through the court, not to take matters into your own hands. California courts often view a parent’s respect for legal orders as a reflection of their ability to provide a stable, responsible home environment.
2. Moving with Your Child without Legal Permission
A common mistake in custody disputes is assuming that a parent can relocate with a child as long as they give notice. In reality, if custody is shared or disputed, relocating without legal approval — even temporarily — can result in loss of custody rights.
California courts generally require either a written agreement from the other parent or permission from the court, especially if the move significantly affects the parenting schedule or relationship.
Under California Family Code §7501, a custodial parent may have the right to move, but that right is subject to judicial review if contested. Courts will weigh whether the move disrupts the child’s ties to the other parent or creates instability. If the court believes the move is not in the child’s best interest, it may order a change in custody.
3. Relying on Informal Custody or Support Agreements
Some parents, hoping to avoid court or costs, reach private agreements on custody schedules or child support. While this may work short-term, unofficial arrangements are not enforceable, and they often backfire.
The California Courts clearly state that child support and custody must be ordered by the court to carry legal weight. Informal deals — whether verbal or written — do not protect you if the other parent changes their mind or stops cooperating.
To avoid ambiguity or legal exposure, always submit any agreement to the court for approval using official forms, such as Form FL-300 (Request for Order) or Form FL-355 (Stipulation and Order for Custody and Support).
4. Badmouthing or Alienating the Other Parent
No matter how strained the relationship, speaking negatively about the other parent in front of your child can seriously damage your custody case. California courts emphasize the importance of maintaining healthy parent-child bonds with both parents, and actively interfering with that relationship can be interpreted as parental alienation.
Under California Family Code §3011, the court considers multiple factors to determine the best interests of the child, including the child’s health, safety, welfare, and emotional well-being. Courts generally view a parent’s ability to support the child’s relationship with both parents as important. Parents who undermine this relationship or prioritize personal grievances over the child’s emotional needs may negatively impact custody decisions.
Courts tend to favor parents who demonstrate emotional maturity, communication skills, and a willingness to co-parent cooperatively.
5. Failing to Document Visitation & Support Payments
In legal disputes, memory isn’t enough. One of the most overlooked tools in a custody or support case is a well-maintained record. Courts rely heavily on documentation to resolve disagreements about visitation schedules, support payments, and communication breakdowns.
Parents are encouraged to maintain logs or use co-parenting apps to track:
- Parenting time and visitation exchanges
- Child support payments and receipts
This documentation can support or defend against modification requests, allegations of noncompliance, or claims of parental misconduct. Without it, your case becomes a matter of "he said, she said" — and that rarely ends well.
Let Us Help Protect Your Rights & Your Child’s Well-Being
Navigating a custody or support case is rarely simple, but avoiding key missteps can help you stay focused on what matters most: your child’s security, routine, and emotional health.
If you're dealing with a difficult custody or support situation, don’t wait for things to escalate. Our La Mesa child custody and divorce attorney is here to offer experienced, compassionate guidance.
Contact us online or call (619) 304-8499 to schedule a consultation today.